Seven of Wands + Queen of Swords, Chinese + Luna Sol

01.09.2022

Using your intuitive smarts to overcome overwhelming odds!

The odds might seem 'stacked against you' - but only if you use the past as a reference.
It may be that you currently are (like me) in the the overwhelmed state, the #FreezeResponse
With your body as well as your brain being well below it's ordinary capacity. 

Oh well, stuck in survival mode (patterns), again...
Going through the motions of the day.
If even that.
Maybe you're like me - laying on the floor most of the day.

But this time it's not the same.
This time I know a lot more about this thing called #trauma and #WhatHappenedToYou !
I've gently opened the door to this thing called #NervousSystemRegulation
I've become familiar with these things called #CPTSD and #AttachmentTrauma 
I have some awareness about this thing called TheWindowOfTolerance and the importance of #FeelingSafe (in your body)
And just recently, I've 'stumbled upon' this thing called #TheBiologyOfTrauma (google #AimieApigian )
Truly an important piece of the puzzle.
I've always had an extremely strange and uncomfortable sense of 'feeling my brain'. 
It's like I can feel when/that something isn't right in there, especially in periods of overwhelm and freeze.
Not to mention the time when they wanted me to take SSRI!
In all good sense, of course - but man did my system protest!!
The side effects were AWFUL. The worst I've ever been through - and I've been through some very nasty anxiety periods, and have lived with anxiety for 41 years now.

I could feel the tingling in my brain. I could sense little warriors trying to fight of this overriding of the system.
And the anxiety? Such a black mess. Terror. 3 weeks.
"Oh, that just shows how much you need it" I was told.
That's cute :)

I'm just learning about this thing called #UnderMethylation , #OxidativeStress in the cells, and #BrainInflammation 
Oh, how all this resonates with my experiences through life!

Dear body, it's not merely about surviving now, we're growing by the minute!
Though some parts of me argue we're 'useless and broken' at the moment ;) #InternalFamilySystems

#ChineseTarot
Theme: "grace"

#LunaSolTarot
Theme: "not survival, but growth - wu wei"

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