SP + S3, Decameron + Tree

12.01.2020

Theme(s): "adults only" + "slow steady organic life growth"ish (here the tree symbolises "the living structure of yourself")

CARDS
Decameron Tarot: Knave of Swords ('Page of Swords')
"The warrior is ready to intervene; the young women clutches his shoulders. Pleasant surprise, if the initiation is not misleading"
The Tarot of Trees: Three of Swords
"Three swords pierce the heart of a tree that has just been cut down. Its lifeblood flows freely from the wounds."
"S3 in a reading can serve as a warning that something in your life is amiss - this may be something you are unaware of or are thus far unwilling to believe. Pay attention to your situation and trust your instincts."
"...remember that just like the Tower, pain in our lives can eventually lead us to positive growth and change." (The Tower 3 days ago)

I've had a Super Sunday, in many ways, so a little bit surprised and/or confused by S3..!
Sure, a little bit "exhausted" now, in line with the "not easy being happy for a newbie" reflection I did yesterday - not quite as peaceful, and maybe a bit empty, but pain..? I wouldn't go that far in describing it!
Or am I "unaware of or thus far unwilling to believe" something...?

Others on S3:
"The Three of Swords is a card that represents your pain. But this is also a card that appears to warn you that you may be inflicting cruelty upon others." ... "What does it mean to see this card when you are feeling stable and emotionally satisfied? The Three of Swords indicates that you may be oblivious to the cruelty you are inflicting on someone. Your life may be going great but perhaps you have no comprehension that playing your loud music late in the night is ruining the health and well-being of a neighbour." ... "the Three of Swords is demanding that you take a deep personal inventory of all aspects of your daily behaviour that could be causing pain to others directly from your unintentional actions." (keen.com)
"The Three of Swords is also about an emotional release. [...] Expressing your sadness is part of the cleansing process and letting it all out will help you move on to better times. Allow yourself the opportunity to experience these emotions, no matter how painful. [...] However, it is also essential that you continue to focus on the path ahead." (biddytarot)
"In Tarot, swords in general stand for mental activity, thoughts, intellectual pursuits, rational approaches, and being very cerebral.  [...] ...we see three swords piercing a bright red, vibrant heart - this simply means, your own mind i.e. your own mentally conjured, ego-based dreams, are at odds with your heart's desires. [...] "The Three of Swords shows an inner affair. An internal heartbreak, one that you're doing to your own self. There isn't anybody else in the card. We're inside your soul. Did you notice the gray clouds and the gray cement-like background? There isn't even one drop of rain. Sometime in the past you must have decided that being vulnerable is a horrible thing. [...] "Possibly, others' approval means more to you than your own heart's approval." (kasamba.com)

So, there are a couple of ways to look at it, but I'm still not sure how to knit it all together.

Sometimes, in cases like this, I ask my "system" for some clarification. If there's another  deck's S3 I should look at.
So, I let's for some clarification regarding S3.
#38 Far Sight Lenormand.
But hey, that's not even a Tarot deck! It doesn't have an S3...!
Well. I guess I have to draw a new card then.
*mix-mix-mix-cut*

Huh?

"Any which way you please; it's your choice; weighing up options and their likely consequences; considering alternatives; wandering; ambivalence; difficulty coming to a decision; a (hung) jury; judicial proceeding; all roads; highways; tracks; trails; crossroads; byways; an unusual person."

Huh?

Any more clarification?
NO.

Ok. Then I have to let this one marinate - Far Sight - Leave it to the future!
Surely time, dreams, further cards and life will reveal it to me - or force me to see and feel what I might be unwilling to see and feel now!

I did just get a palpable and sudden PAIN somewhere close to my 2nd (sacral) chakra though, maybe that's a clue too?

_____

I better withdraw and do some Emotional Awareness work, reflect on my situation and my actions, ponder a bit over vulnerability and feel whether I have listened to my heart's desire or searched for other's approval.
Some detached inner watching and feeling - which seamlessly can transition into meditation!

Deck(s) #25 and #128: Decameron Tarot and The Tarot of Trees (also available as an app)