Ten of Swords + Three of Cups, Spirit Within + White Numen
Oh, how it pains the ego to surrender (see yesterday)!!
To accept the 'unfair/tough' responsibilities of an adult, and stop distracting yourself with all kinds of pleasures. Pleasures that the ego have all kinds of motivations for you to purse - saying you deserve it, that they are 'good for your soul', or 'practical', or any other 'good intention, 'well ment' reason.
The ego/head is sly that way. It loves to dress things in 'nice words', and make them SOUND good.
But if you have to clad it in words ("motivate it" to yourself/others) it's not the right thing to do, or it might be the wrong time to do it.
Timing is all important. And the ego know little or nothing about timing! That's something you have to leave to your intuition ('spirit within') not your reasoning!
When you KNOW you have to do something - whether you understand why or not - there's no 'talking about it', you just do it.
And now there are things that need to be done. Maybe not "fun" in a celebratory sense, but the deep satisfaction of doing the RIGHT things far trumps the 'shallow feeling' of "sheer fun". Short term pleasure.
Maybe you will have to say no to a party or gathering. Refrain from something 'fun'. (Ex: restrictions have now been totally lifted in Sweden...so much "ego-tripping" is likely to occur. People exercising their "rights", and satisfying their cravings (rather than the needs of the collective).)
What you need to do right now is more important than merely 'enjoying yourself', and will lay a foundation for deep seated gratification, and contribute to the "general awakening".
Great work - the worst is over!
But don't force it, let it come to you.
Deck: Spirit Within Tarot
Theme: "you are more than your body"
Deck: White Numen Tarot
Theme: "return home - don't push it, let it come"